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The Insecure Self

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The insecure self is the part of every being that manifests almost mostly in the presence of the other.Perhaps it begins in our awkward and uncomfortable pubescent years. Almost every being exists as a literal vessel of insecurity and mess. Perhaps beings are comforted by the thought that there is a possibility that the Insecure Self will simmer down as they age. But what does that mean? Validation through some of the most toxic relationships we will encounter? Freely handing out our sex to anyone that will have it?

The subconscious self. Every being has the most exclusive access to subconscious thoughts. What self-love dictates is that we cherish our minds wholly: consciously and subconsciously; that we are able to face our own darkness – shamelessly – and fearlessly. The insecure self is then manifested through allowing access to others. Its growth is dependent on the development of the fear that through allowing access to the other, complete and absolute control is relinquished – the insecure self is handed to the other: the fear dictates that our own darkness will be manipulated and controlled by someone other than the self. Perhaps the reality, in the absence of cynicism, is that we hand ourselves over to the other with the pure intention of healing.

My insecure, subconscious, and conscious self would never allow that. The reason is pure and entirely simplistic – pride. Pride tends to form a large part of the Stronger Self. It defends and protects fearlessly and doubtlessly because although a being may seem transparent, pride renders the soul opaque. Pride instructs that we do not give away too much of ourselves – this sickens and casts disappointment over the soul. Pride is of an extremely complex nature.

A nature such as mine allows me to see through even the most opaque soul. The other may drone on extensively about what a guarded soul he possesses. However, the Guarded Self almost instantaneously allows the other access once loved. Weakness. This creates the premise that pride forms a large part of the Stronger Self. Love is then our Weaker Selves.

Love blinds and disguises. It does not form part of the Insecure Self – however, the loss of it does. When loved, beings develop the Vulnerable Self – the unreasonable, irrational self. It causes the soul to soften tremendously. But pride prevents access to the Insecure Self. It protects us from the Vulnerable Self. It reminds beings of resilience and pure strength. It teaches the soul to harden and repair itself. It treats the being as a temple and builds it higher.

By virtue of this, then, is pride the opposite of love?

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